One year later...almost

With my birthday fast approaching...YIKES I will be 33. I am finding myself reflecting on the last year. What a wild ride it has been. I was not near ready enough on my birthday last year for what was about to send my world into a frenzied spiral. I cannot say that a year later I have anymore wisdom or control in my life now. I guess I feel like I should but my life has turned out much different than expected. I am making this all sound bad but its not bad it is just so much different. For instance I quit my county job. A job that I worked incredibly hard for many years. My day is now filled with laundry and emptying the dishwasher. There is nothing in my day that is glamorous or even worth writing about except my two beautifully growing boys. That is the difference from last year to this one. Its not about me anymore not one bit. It is about them.

One of the hardest decisions I have to say would not be quitting my job surprisingly. On Friday we gave up our beloved Lab Doc. We had been talking about it for some time and knew that it was indeed time for him to leave our family. He wasn't good with the kids it turns out and never really adapted over the last year. We had been putting it off and putting it off. The time came and now its done. I have to say I know that it was the right decision but tell that to my heart and it disagrees. I cannot go a day without crying and I have not felt so much pain in a very long time. Like I said before my world this past year has changed so much. I don't really even recognize myself anymore. I am a new Amy...One without a county job, a black dog and mascara. Although I don't really miss the make up.

In the next few weeks we will hit the big one year birthday milestone. I have been waiting for this day a long time and I just knew things would be so much easier by then right?!? HA! Not happening that way quite as planned. I am hoping the next blog entry I write I will tell you about an easy day...but as honesty would have it there has not been many of those in a very long time for the Oliver family. I know that everyday is worth it though when the boys giggle at each other and give us big smiles. because life will never be the same for us again....parenthood is a wild ride full of twists and turns of fate. I am anxious to see where it takes us in the next year. I cannot even guess where I will be on my next birthday. I promise to start writing more ...but we will see if the boys allow such time.